Yesterday, I went snowboarding with cousins Matteo and Claudio, and Matteo's friend Flavio. The nearest slopes are only an hour drive away and I had no idea what to expect in terms of the size of the mountain (maybe it would be a "big hill" by California Lake Tahoe and Mt. Shasta standards). I was pleased to see that it was, in fact, a very good sized mountain with numerous ski slopes of all shapes and sizes. I had been hoping to go snowboarding this year, since I've gone with friends for the last 3 or 4 years in California, but I had given up hope until last week when Matteo suggested we go for the day. And we made it just in time: on Friday it felt like the first day of Spring and a few days before that it had rained, so most of the snow has been disappearing. This was true on the mountain, too. Even at the top, looking down from the ski lift were grasses and bushes peaking out from under a thin layer of snow.
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| Getting ready after a lunch (and beer) break. |
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| Flavio and Matteo |
The most surprising part for me was that I kept shedding layers of clothes. It was about 50 degrees Fahrenheit, even at the summit, and the sun was beating down all day. It was the first time I've ever been to the snow and have been hot just standing still in the sun (I usually get warm once I start snowboarding because of the exercise, but my nose and cheeks are always freezing no matter what). But yesterday, I removed the warm inside liner of my snow jacket (and I kept the shell on...usually unzipped as I was going down the slopes), I didn't have any need for a hat or scarf, and the snow gloves I borrowed from Matteo were only on my hands when I was actually snowboarding because my hands would sweat otherwise. I finally understood those pictures in which Norwegian or Swiss skiers would be wearing simply tank tops and leggings, or even shorts. Before yesterday, I thought those people were crazy and I wondered how they could even fathom not wearing hats, snow pants, and a heavy jacket. Now it makes complete sense because on more than one occasion I was tempted to take off my long-sleeved REI shirt and just keep on my tank top. Of course I didn't because I knew I would inevitably fall and be very grateful to have some extra layers protecting me from the icy snow.
And I did fall--several times of course. But the biggest falls were not of my own clumsiness and loss of control. (Well, twice I did find an alternative way to get down the mountain faster using my butt instead of the board...but that's normal for me.) The first big fall happened fairly early in the day: I was minding my own business, making sure to keep a good distance from the people in front of me and to not make any unsuspected moves so the faster people behind me could easily move around me on the wide slope, and somehow a skier came close enough to me that he caught the edge of my board and we got tangled and slid down part of the slope. Neither of us were hurt and I was fortunate to slide on my back instead of falling forward like he did. After exchanging a simple and short "sorry, are you ok?" it made me realize how much more space we give others in the U.S. There were many times yesterday when skiers and snowboarders came waaaaaay too close for comfort to me, and I was unfortunately guilty of that a few times on the narrower paths. I guess the limited personal space is involved in all aspects of life: on the streets, on the buses, on the ski slopes.... I wouldn't say it "bothered" me, since I've gotten more used to it living here for 6 months, but I definitely noticed that it was a different custom from that on the ski slopes in California.
The next 3 times that I fell not on my own accord were as I was coming to a stop at the bottom of a slope or reaching a plateau at a crossing of two slopes. One of these times I was carefully trying to pass stopped skiers and snowboarders (in the middle of the intersection) in order to get to Matteo who was waiting for me. I had a clear shot, but someone came into my view heading straight toward me, lightly ran into me, and caused me to swerve and run into 3 more guys (one of whom fell down--oops). It was like a domino effect. So of course I apologized to the people I had run into and checked to see if they were ok, and I looked back at the guy who had cut me off and he gave me a simple "scusami" ("sorry"). The other two times were when I was almost completely stopped at the bottom of a slope and someone else ran into me and knocked me off balance since I wasn't expecting to have an extra force coming in behind me.
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| View coming down the mountain at the end of the day. |
So needless to say, my muscles are REALLY sore today. But it was definitely worth it! It was so much fun to snowboard again, AND I finally learned how to use my toe edge (at least on reasonably flat surfaces where I don't get too much speed), and I successfully navigated my way and kept my velocity up on a flatter and very narrow course. Usually I fail miserably when I have to use my toe edge on a flat surface because I always over- or under- compensate and catch it in the snow and therefore fall on my face. And I've consistently noticed that as soon as the idea of doubt enters my head, I wobble, catch an edge, and usually fall. Then I can't stop thinking "Wow, that sucked. I can't use my toe edge. Ok I'll try one more time. I'm doing it! No no, don't catch in the snow please...I'm going to fall... I really don't want to fall right now...oh no, I'm falling!" So yesterday, even after getting plowed into from behind a couple times, I decided that I wasn't going to lose my confidence. I had attempted using my toe edge when no one else was around and I had been successful, so why shouldn't I be able to use it when people were around? So I did, and I was able to keep control of my board and then do it again because I had built my confidence up.
Honestly, I think this confidence stemmed from my newfound confidence in myself generally. This past November and December, I somehow had lost a lot of my personal and social confidence and I didn't know how to get it back. I hadn't felt like that since Elementary School when I worried what people thought of me and whether people liked me. But what helped me turn that mindset around was seeing Tarn and Maygol: two of my best friends who know me completely and who love me unconditionally. It was the exact medicine I needed: to be surrounded for 4 weeks by people who I KNEW cared about me no matter what I said or did. Don't get me wrong: I absolutely love meeting new people and making new friends, and I've been so lucky to meet such amazing people this year! But it's hard to find that complete comfort that comes with being with a best friend because that has to come with time. And so after I did well on all 3 of my finals, started an internship that I really enjoy, figured out my class schedule for the semester, and continued tutoring and babysitting once a week, I finally have my confidence back. I'm now living MY life here in Bologna and I feel grounded. I'm confident in my Italian-speaking capabilities, I understand my classes, I'm getting to know people in my program better, and I'm truly enjoying myself.
I'm excited for Spring to fully arrive and I have a birthday-weekend trip planned with Allison and one of her friends to Cinque Terre, I have my life here in Bologna to keep me busy, and I will be back in sunny California on June 17th. I have a lot to look forward to and a lot of amazing experiences to look back on. So I'll be making the best of these next 4 months and attempt to keep you all apprised of my continued adventure.
